Monday, October 28, 2013

Variation on the Word Sleep
I would like to watch you sleeping, 
which may not happen.
I would like to watch you, 
sleeping. I would like to sleep 
with you, to enter 
your sleep as its smooth dark wave 
slides over my head

and walk with you through that lucent 
wavering forest of bluegreen leaves 
with its watery sun & three moons 
towards the cave where you must descend, 
towards your worst fear

I would like to give you the silver 
branch, the small white flower, the one 
word that will protect you 
from the grief at the center 
of your dream, from the grief 
at the center. I would like to follow 
you up the long stairway 
again & become
the boat that would row you back
carefully, a flame
in two cupped hands 
to where your body lies 
beside me, and you enter 
it as easily as breathing in

I would like to be the air
that inhabits you for a moment
only. I would like to be that unnoticed
& that necessary.

- Margaret Atwood

Sunday, October 27, 2013

I swing back and forth between 
                 and anxiety 
like a pendulum. 
On the one side I contemplate my misery
          and on the other I create it. 

Friday, October 25, 2013

I light a cigarette and wait for you to turn to ash.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

I hunger for your salty skin and I thirst for you, juicy
because I am insatiable. 

Mt 5:6

Tuesday, October 22, 2013


      I wither slowly in thine arms,
Here at the quiet limit of the world,
A white-hair'd shadow roaming like a dream

-Tennyson, "Tithonus"

Monday, October 21, 2013

All I want is to fall in love with a rich man who dresses well, owns a sailboat and a house by the sea, and I wouldn't even mind if he listened to smooth jazz.

Saturday, October 5, 2013

Then you must go. 
I sat cross-legged on the bed.
There is no room for self-pity

I said 
I lied.

I sang the "Salve Regina" this morning. I could smell frankincense. I could feel it flowing through my veins and bleeding out of my pores. I need to sing out all of my demons and find some tired consolation. Today is dedicated to aching.